The Radiohead show in Charlotte was awesome. They really rocked it out, and did two encores. They even did Paranoid Android, which I didn't think could be done live (in my face). Met up with some friends-of-friends who were fun folks, and did some pre-gaming. I am in general a beer snob (fuck you, budweiser) but was able to slum it with some miller light (still not my favorite, but drinkable). Although the show was great, the prices were extortionate at the concessions stands. A 16oz can of Miller light - $9. A tour t-shirt - $40. A 16oz bottle of soda or water - $5. And the restrooms facilities were not sufficient either, I had to wait in line to take a piss. Guys should never have to wait to pee, it is one of the laws of the universe. And my final complaint, apparently they haven't figured out how to direct traffic out of there (the Verizon Ampitheater) because my car did not leave it's parking spot for a full hour after we got back to it, being blocked in by immobile cars front and back. Which is a bit ironic, because Radiohead had hired a consultant company to make sure they were touring as "green" as possible. I'm guessing that 10,000 cars idling for an hour were not conducive to that. The venue is set up so that it is only accessible by one road. Very poor planning.
We got into town early, and decided to kill some time in a sports bar in Concord, right down the road from the Speedway. By the way, that thing is fucking massive. Obviously, it has to be, but I was dumbstruck how those bleacher sections just keep going and going. Anyway, if you are ever in a redneck sportsbar in a redneck nascar town, let me assure you that you will draw some mystified stares by playing Magic the Gathering on the table. Also, while we were there, a group of Harley biker guys came in (no surprise) and with them was a dude with both legs amputated. He was on an electric gurney-looking thing (not a wheel chair, he was laying face down). we didn't think twice about it, but when we walked out later, we saw a pack of Harleys out front, and with them was this big tricycle thing with a big open compartment. Then we realized that this thing was that amputee's motorcycle! How cool is that that he didn't let it stop him? He just rolls his gurney-mobile onto this platform and rides. That is fucking hardcore, son!
So we finally rolled out of the venue at about 1am, went to a friend's house and drank and shot the shit until about 3. Woke up around 10 and went to this awesome greasy-spoon diner called Sammies and had an amazing turkey-sausage omelet, grits, biscuits, sweet tea (one of the best breakfasts ever) for about $6. Rest of the weekend was uneventful and went by too fast. Played a bunch of games with mom and sister for Mother's day.
Tueday I woke up with a splitting headache. To me, there are few things worse on earth than waking up with a headache. There is zero chance that my day will go well if I wake up with a headache. It was bad enough that I called in sick to work, and that turned out to be a good choice because it got progressively worse as the day went on. By the afternoon, it was pain so intense that it made me queasy and dizzy. It felt like someone had driven a nail into my left temple and then proceeded to thump it every few seconds. I have been to several doctors and neurologists about my headaches, but they have never been able to do anything about them. There seems to be no pattern as to when I get them, and having taken about all there is to take for headaches, nothing seems to alleviate the pain (I took some morphine on tuesday and got nothing. what the hell is stronger than morphine?). I am considering using a power drill to create a pressure vent in my forehead, but am not sure how safe that would be. Guess there's only one way to find out.
I ate dinner at Mellow Mushroom last night. If you have never been, it is a chain of hippie pizza places across the south. They have great beer selection, great food, and typically friendly (if slightly stoned) servers. They have one of the best selections of pizza toppings anywhere, including meat substitutes like tofu and tempeh, several kinds of mushrooms, and my personal favorite, spicy jerk chicken. They have a semi-sweet pizza sauce and they bake parmesan cheese into the crust (which is also slightly sweet, almost like flaky pie crust). I highly recommend the chain in general, but in my experience they vary significantly by location. The one in downtown Raleigh blows. The one in Boone is nice and cozy and has a super friendly waitstaff. But if you ever have a chance to go to the one in Asheville, do it. Best service ever, huge bar, a big interior with lots of crazy crap on the walls, and a really nice arbor outside to eat out when the weather is nice. And one of the dudes that works ther hand-crocheted his hairnet, that is one hippie dedicated to restaurant hygiene. Also, my personal favorite, because I am apparently 7 years old, the signs leading to the bathrooms say "Mellow Flushrooms". teehee. If you ever want to see a 250 pound man giggle like a little girl, show me one of those signs.
Top Chef comment for the week - ugh. Dale wins a challenge for cooking - surprise! - asian food. Like he has for every single challenge. Such a well-rounded chef. And Andrew, one of the arrogant asshole guys got booted. *sniff*. He struck me as beign a total wigger, he could never complete a sentence in the "confessionals" without dropping a series of tourette's-like cursing. I won't miss him. And I hope Lisa has something horrible happen to her, what a B.
The Office this week was one of my favorite episodes ever. I have always felt that the supporting cast are the best parts of the show, and this one was very background character focused. The storyline where the new HR lady thought Kevin was retarded - fucking genius. There was one of the best Creed monologues ever. And it even started out with a classic Jim prank on Dwight, like the old days. I do think they are getting a little more dramatic than I care for, with marriage proposals, pregnancies, and Angela cheating on her new fiance. I am glad that they seem to be writing Ryan out of the continuity, they really turned him into a miserable, unlikable character.
Props - Radiohead; Sammies Diner; The Earl finale; the Office finale; me, for not gaining any weight since moving down here, despite all the stress, good food, and general lack of exercise. The sequence is: obesity, alligator mouth, me.
Slops - anyone remotely related to the Verizon Wireless Ampitheater design, parking, or concessions; The Office for putting out so many crappy episodes this season until the finale; My Name is Earl for putting out so many trippy, bizarre, or just plain bad episodes before the finale; migraines; fish oil capsules; the new McDonald's Insult to the South Southern chicken fillets.
Friday, May 16, 2008
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Delirium's Chartreuse Spatula
Some quick thoughts for the day.
Tomorrow I will be in Charlotte for the Radiohead show. I am pretty psyched. Not as psyched about the 4 hour drive each way, nor the $3.60/gallon gas for said trip. But ehh, what am I gonna do? It'd be awesome if they would go ahead and set up a train system similar to the eurail or britishrail in this country. By tomorrow, ideally.
Top Chef - while I still love this show, and I think I will go to culinary school after my midlife crisis, this season is a big ol' wtf?!?! In previous seasons, there has been a pretty distinct line between the wheat and the chaff. I have been able to predict the final 5 by the 2nd episode every prior season. This season, nobody seems that good. I get the impression that they chose the contestants 100% by personality and not by talent. Which is kind of weird, because by and large most of this season's chefs are "more qualified" than previous seasons, in that most of them are already executive chefs or restaraunteurs. My feelings are that the final 3 will be Antonia, Richard, and any one of the most obnoxious assholes (Spike, Dale, or Andrew). Stephanie is good, but I think she will crack under the pressure, she doesn't have a strong enough personality to hang with all those crazies. But ultimately, I don't care who wins because I don't really like any of them. Not like Casey from last year (rrrrrrowwwww!)
Root of All Evil - The new show on Comedy Central. I don't get it. I should like it, I am a fan of Lewis Black, Patton Oswalt, and several of the other comedians that have been on there. It just strikes me as a pointless and stupid show. Basically, two comedians are given a topic to defend as the most evil of the two topics and Lewis Black renders a verdict like it is a legal trial or something. The comedians do standup routines based on their topic being evil. But for the most part, the topics are unrelated to eachother and the material completely hinges on knowing about the topic (for example, last night one of the topics was Donald Trump. I don't watch the Apprentice and never have, so most all of the material was over my head, or under my feet in this case). So basically, it is two standup bits stetched out to fill 22 minutes of airtime. Not as good as it should be given the talent level usually on there.
Pick up a copy of Feeling Kind of Patton by Patton Oswalt on CD if you haven't already. It is phenomenal and I will be quoting it on this blog fairly often.
Inflammatory political comment - I don't vote. I have never registered to vote. I don't plan on voting this November. The system doesn't work. I live in North Carolina. It does not matter who I vote for, because this state always votes Republican for president (although it is swing by district for Congress and Governor). That is not to say that I am a Democrat, it is more a statement that the Electoral college is a tragically flawed dinosaur that should be abolished. The technology exists that the popular vote can be determined as easily as the bullshit electoral state by state breakdown, so what's the point of it? Is also gives unfair advantage to the large populations states (e.g. California, NY, Florida) regardless of how many people actually show up to vote. If all 1,000,000 Voters in Idaho show up and vote, their state's electoral votes are still 4. If two people show up to the polls in California, their electoral votes are 55, 14 times as many. Why is voter turnout so bad in this country? Because for the most part, your vote doesn't matter.
Oh, and if I were to vote this year, it would be for Ron Paul. As it happens, I agree with his entire platform except that he's pro-life (and I don't see anywhere on his site what he thinks about gay marriage, which I am FOR). http://www.ronpaul2008.com/
Props: Cinnamon Toast Crunch; Star Trek: The Next Generation; me, for my fantasticity
Slops: me, for not being able to turn off the ST:TNG dvds before 2am; the real estate market in Cincinnati; people too lazy to use their fucking turn signals
Tomorrow I will be in Charlotte for the Radiohead show. I am pretty psyched. Not as psyched about the 4 hour drive each way, nor the $3.60/gallon gas for said trip. But ehh, what am I gonna do? It'd be awesome if they would go ahead and set up a train system similar to the eurail or britishrail in this country. By tomorrow, ideally.
Top Chef - while I still love this show, and I think I will go to culinary school after my midlife crisis, this season is a big ol' wtf?!?! In previous seasons, there has been a pretty distinct line between the wheat and the chaff. I have been able to predict the final 5 by the 2nd episode every prior season. This season, nobody seems that good. I get the impression that they chose the contestants 100% by personality and not by talent. Which is kind of weird, because by and large most of this season's chefs are "more qualified" than previous seasons, in that most of them are already executive chefs or restaraunteurs. My feelings are that the final 3 will be Antonia, Richard, and any one of the most obnoxious assholes (Spike, Dale, or Andrew). Stephanie is good, but I think she will crack under the pressure, she doesn't have a strong enough personality to hang with all those crazies. But ultimately, I don't care who wins because I don't really like any of them. Not like Casey from last year (rrrrrrowwwww!)
Root of All Evil - The new show on Comedy Central. I don't get it. I should like it, I am a fan of Lewis Black, Patton Oswalt, and several of the other comedians that have been on there. It just strikes me as a pointless and stupid show. Basically, two comedians are given a topic to defend as the most evil of the two topics and Lewis Black renders a verdict like it is a legal trial or something. The comedians do standup routines based on their topic being evil. But for the most part, the topics are unrelated to eachother and the material completely hinges on knowing about the topic (for example, last night one of the topics was Donald Trump. I don't watch the Apprentice and never have, so most all of the material was over my head, or under my feet in this case). So basically, it is two standup bits stetched out to fill 22 minutes of airtime. Not as good as it should be given the talent level usually on there.
Pick up a copy of Feeling Kind of Patton by Patton Oswalt on CD if you haven't already. It is phenomenal and I will be quoting it on this blog fairly often.
Inflammatory political comment - I don't vote. I have never registered to vote. I don't plan on voting this November. The system doesn't work. I live in North Carolina. It does not matter who I vote for, because this state always votes Republican for president (although it is swing by district for Congress and Governor). That is not to say that I am a Democrat, it is more a statement that the Electoral college is a tragically flawed dinosaur that should be abolished. The technology exists that the popular vote can be determined as easily as the bullshit electoral state by state breakdown, so what's the point of it? Is also gives unfair advantage to the large populations states (e.g. California, NY, Florida) regardless of how many people actually show up to vote. If all 1,000,000 Voters in Idaho show up and vote, their state's electoral votes are still 4. If two people show up to the polls in California, their electoral votes are 55, 14 times as many. Why is voter turnout so bad in this country? Because for the most part, your vote doesn't matter.
Oh, and if I were to vote this year, it would be for Ron Paul. As it happens, I agree with his entire platform except that he's pro-life (and I don't see anywhere on his site what he thinks about gay marriage, which I am FOR). http://www.ronpaul2008.com/
Props: Cinnamon Toast Crunch; Star Trek: The Next Generation; me, for my fantasticity
Slops: me, for not being able to turn off the ST:TNG dvds before 2am; the real estate market in Cincinnati; people too lazy to use their fucking turn signals
Monday, May 5, 2008
Wilmington Foodblog - Eats in the Port City
I am living in Wilmington, NC at the moment. Technically I live at my parents' house which is admittedly sad at age 28, but it is a temporary thing while my wife is in Cincinnati selling our house. Honest. And I live in an apartment above the garage, like Kirk Cameron in the last season of Growing Pains (no roommate named Boner though, sorry).
But being a fat guy, and loving to eat out, I figured I could do restaurant reviews for this town, which is a great place for gourmands, connoisseurs, and gluttons (like me!). Mind you, I won't be reviewing any upscale places, because I don't eat in any. I really don't like paying more than $20/person before drinks. Why should I pay $100 for some tiny scraps of food, especially if I have to get dressed up to get eat there? F that crap.
DISCLAIMER: I do not eat beef or pork. I only know where good burgers/steaks/chorizo are by word of mouth. Assume all of my ratings are based on poultry or seafood dishes. /DISCLAIMER
Oh, and to show how not-classy my reviews are, I will be rating the restaurants in a gastronomical unit I just invented called the "tongasm". Here we go:
J Michael's Philly Deli: This place is a cornerstone of Wilmington dining. Nothing fancy, just awesome heart-clogging deliciousness. They are best know for their cheesesteaks (and chicken cheesesteaks) that contain at least half a pound each of shaved meat and melted provolone. There is so much molten cheese that there is typically a puddle of it between the two sandwich halves (served in a basket). They have over a dozen styles of these beauties with various toppings. Very good, very filling, and quite reasonable pricing. Tongasms: 9/10
Flaming Amy's Burrito Barn: I don't know what it is about places like this, but for some reason hippies or punks always make great food. This particular place is somewhat punk (they have Tattoo Tuesdays where you show your "ink" and get 10% off and the employees have lots of various piercings and whatnot) along with various counterculture/tacky decor on the walls. The portions are large, and the choices are endless (there are about 20 meat/protein options and about 30 veggies/beans/plant stuff to assemble your burrito/taco with). They also have a salsa bar with lots of tasty options including ginger peach, pineapple jalapeno, and a flavorful hot. Only complaints are that the chips aren't anything special, and the dining room is generally dirty (salsa + chips + children/drunk people/drunk children = mess). Tongasms: 7/10
K38 Baja Grill: I don't get it. This place is always packed to the gills. Good luck finding parking on their $1 taco nights. But the food sucks! It is tex-mex style, which I have never been a fan of anyway. Their homemade salsa is good, and actually pretty spicy which is a welcome change from most places. But really, with lots of good Mexican places in town, why would you eat here? Is it the bastardized cuisine or the high prices that reel people in? The cramped, dark dining room maybe? Tongasms: 2/10 (and I think I faked one of them)
Romanelli's: This has always been a favorite of our family's. They have a nice mix on the menu of American-style classics, pasta, pizza, and bar food. This is the place we often go to for family meals, especially with the grandparents. They have a $0.35 wing night that is a great deal (their wings actually have meat on them, and are big). I can't recall ever getting something there I haven't liked. And while some of the "entrees" are a bit expensive, most everything is under $10-12. There is also a full bar with several draft beer choices. Tongasms: 8/10
PT's Grille: Another Wilmington Staple. Very simple food: burgers, grilled chicken, dogs, and grilled sandwiches served up fast and tasty. The fries have a lemon pepper dusting that is light and unique. All of their locations have outdoor seating that allows you to enjoy a nice breeze, some sun, and sip on their homemade lemonade until you dread going back to work. I'm told they have the best burgers in town. Tongasms: 7/10
More restaurants to come.
Props: J Michaels for staying the course for all these years (We're not changing a God-Damned thing!) ; Romanelli's BBQ chicken pizza; Me, for ruling
Slops: K38 (Why so popular? Why?); 19th century French aristocrats; Mayonnaise
But being a fat guy, and loving to eat out, I figured I could do restaurant reviews for this town, which is a great place for gourmands, connoisseurs, and gluttons (like me!). Mind you, I won't be reviewing any upscale places, because I don't eat in any. I really don't like paying more than $20/person before drinks. Why should I pay $100 for some tiny scraps of food, especially if I have to get dressed up to get eat there? F that crap.
DISCLAIMER: I do not eat beef or pork. I only know where good burgers/steaks/chorizo are by word of mouth. Assume all of my ratings are based on poultry or seafood dishes. /DISCLAIMER
Oh, and to show how not-classy my reviews are, I will be rating the restaurants in a gastronomical unit I just invented called the "tongasm". Here we go:
J Michael's Philly Deli: This place is a cornerstone of Wilmington dining. Nothing fancy, just awesome heart-clogging deliciousness. They are best know for their cheesesteaks (and chicken cheesesteaks) that contain at least half a pound each of shaved meat and melted provolone. There is so much molten cheese that there is typically a puddle of it between the two sandwich halves (served in a basket). They have over a dozen styles of these beauties with various toppings. Very good, very filling, and quite reasonable pricing. Tongasms: 9/10
Flaming Amy's Burrito Barn: I don't know what it is about places like this, but for some reason hippies or punks always make great food. This particular place is somewhat punk (they have Tattoo Tuesdays where you show your "ink" and get 10% off and the employees have lots of various piercings and whatnot) along with various counterculture/tacky decor on the walls. The portions are large, and the choices are endless (there are about 20 meat/protein options and about 30 veggies/beans/plant stuff to assemble your burrito/taco with). They also have a salsa bar with lots of tasty options including ginger peach, pineapple jalapeno, and a flavorful hot. Only complaints are that the chips aren't anything special, and the dining room is generally dirty (salsa + chips + children/drunk people/drunk children = mess). Tongasms: 7/10
K38 Baja Grill: I don't get it. This place is always packed to the gills. Good luck finding parking on their $1 taco nights. But the food sucks! It is tex-mex style, which I have never been a fan of anyway. Their homemade salsa is good, and actually pretty spicy which is a welcome change from most places. But really, with lots of good Mexican places in town, why would you eat here? Is it the bastardized cuisine or the high prices that reel people in? The cramped, dark dining room maybe? Tongasms: 2/10 (and I think I faked one of them)
Romanelli's: This has always been a favorite of our family's. They have a nice mix on the menu of American-style classics, pasta, pizza, and bar food. This is the place we often go to for family meals, especially with the grandparents. They have a $0.35 wing night that is a great deal (their wings actually have meat on them, and are big). I can't recall ever getting something there I haven't liked. And while some of the "entrees" are a bit expensive, most everything is under $10-12. There is also a full bar with several draft beer choices. Tongasms: 8/10
PT's Grille: Another Wilmington Staple. Very simple food: burgers, grilled chicken, dogs, and grilled sandwiches served up fast and tasty. The fries have a lemon pepper dusting that is light and unique. All of their locations have outdoor seating that allows you to enjoy a nice breeze, some sun, and sip on their homemade lemonade until you dread going back to work. I'm told they have the best burgers in town. Tongasms: 7/10
More restaurants to come.
Props: J Michaels for staying the course for all these years (We're not changing a God-Damned thing!) ; Romanelli's BBQ chicken pizza; Me, for ruling
Slops: K38 (Why so popular? Why?); 19th century French aristocrats; Mayonnaise
Sunday, May 4, 2008
Iron Man - Good Stuff
So as a comic book nerd, I was anxiously awaiting the movie Iron Man, in theaters this weekend. I was not disappointed.
The good parts of this movie were really good. Robert Downey Jr. did a superb job of portraying the cocky, attention-starved Tony Stark (not a huge stretch for Downey, agreed) and spouted one-liners and innuendos throughout, adding a comedic element that I certainly appreciated. The special effects were amazing, with breath-taking flight scenes and aerial acrobatics, along with about as many explosions as one could hope to cram into a 2 hour film. And not to spoil things for those that haven't seen it, there is a bonus scene after the credits that left a Marvel Zombie like me drooling for more (hint: Samuel L. Jackson, need I say more?).
The bad parts were really minor quibbles that didn't take away from the movie, or wouldn't have if I didn't already know the story from the comics. A lot of the plot had been "updated" so that the "bad guys" were an Al-Queda clone and Iron Man is fighting the war on terror. That didn't really bother me. The only other complaint I had was the beefed up part of Stark's assistant Pepper Potts, played by Gwyneth Paltrow. For a relatively minor character, she was on screen an awful lot. However, Gwyneth as a redhead is yummadumdum (redheads are my kryptonite).
Overall I have to give full props to Jon Favreau for making a comic book movie that non-comic fans can enjoy, without alienating the fans. I only wish that overpaid douchebags like Bret Ratner and Michael Bay could have done the same thing instead of driving some of my favorite franchises into the ground (X-Men 3 and Transformers, dis-respectively). My sister went with me to the movie, and she said she really enjoyed it, and she is as far from a comic book fan as they come.
props: Jon Favreau; Robert Downey Jr.; me, for being great
slops: jackass that was texting throughout the movie, with the brightest backlit phone ever; people that bring small children to PG-13 movies and allow them to yell at the screen, that is what Finding Nemo DVDs are for.
The good parts of this movie were really good. Robert Downey Jr. did a superb job of portraying the cocky, attention-starved Tony Stark (not a huge stretch for Downey, agreed) and spouted one-liners and innuendos throughout, adding a comedic element that I certainly appreciated. The special effects were amazing, with breath-taking flight scenes and aerial acrobatics, along with about as many explosions as one could hope to cram into a 2 hour film. And not to spoil things for those that haven't seen it, there is a bonus scene after the credits that left a Marvel Zombie like me drooling for more (hint: Samuel L. Jackson, need I say more?).
The bad parts were really minor quibbles that didn't take away from the movie, or wouldn't have if I didn't already know the story from the comics. A lot of the plot had been "updated" so that the "bad guys" were an Al-Queda clone and Iron Man is fighting the war on terror. That didn't really bother me. The only other complaint I had was the beefed up part of Stark's assistant Pepper Potts, played by Gwyneth Paltrow. For a relatively minor character, she was on screen an awful lot. However, Gwyneth as a redhead is yummadumdum (redheads are my kryptonite).
Overall I have to give full props to Jon Favreau for making a comic book movie that non-comic fans can enjoy, without alienating the fans. I only wish that overpaid douchebags like Bret Ratner and Michael Bay could have done the same thing instead of driving some of my favorite franchises into the ground (X-Men 3 and Transformers, dis-respectively). My sister went with me to the movie, and she said she really enjoyed it, and she is as far from a comic book fan as they come.
props: Jon Favreau; Robert Downey Jr.; me, for being great
slops: jackass that was texting throughout the movie, with the brightest backlit phone ever; people that bring small children to PG-13 movies and allow them to yell at the screen, that is what Finding Nemo DVDs are for.
Friday, May 2, 2008
The epic saga begins
At the behest of my wife, I have started this blog (and only 3 years after everyone else on earth has, I'm so cutting edge!). Yes, even after Umbobo *click* *click* Djimsu created his blog on fighting lions with rocks and spears and his home remedies for malaria.
So in the coming weeks/months/until I get bored of it, you, the internet public, will have the distinct displeasure of reading my unique blend of insanity, cursing, and grammatical errors. My posts will be seasoned with: random movie and TV quotes you will not get, rants about how stupid the general public is, rants about how stupid the people in charge are, my enemies list, and of course, a lot of lists and bullet points you won't give a damn about.
I hope you are looking forward to it as I am. Or not, whatever. See if I care. *sniff*
So in the coming weeks/months/until I get bored of it, you, the internet public, will have the distinct displeasure of reading my unique blend of insanity, cursing, and grammatical errors. My posts will be seasoned with: random movie and TV quotes you will not get, rants about how stupid the general public is, rants about how stupid the people in charge are, my enemies list, and of course, a lot of lists and bullet points you won't give a damn about.
I hope you are looking forward to it as I am. Or not, whatever. See if I care. *sniff*
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